How to tell someone you love them: easy ways to show you care

It’s a comedy staple – the ill-timed confession of love. While it’s funny in fiction, knowing how to tell someone you love them is key to a successful relationship. Regardless of what stage of dating you’re in, it’s always nice to know that your partner loves, or at least appreciates you. That said, even if your feelings are very strong, you still might not be sure how to tell someone how much you love them. In this article, we’ll look at a few of the best ways to tell someone you love them, complete with examples.

How to tell someone you love them without saying it

Sometimes, words aren’t the best option for how to tell someone you love them. It might be too early in the relationship, or your partner might be the kind who prefers actions over words. They might even have something in their past that makes them wary of anyone who says the words too soon. If you’re dating someone like that, don’t despair! Here are ten ideas for how to tell someone you love them without saying it:

1. Practice active listening: Being heard is a wonderful gift you can give someone you love, so be sure to listen, remember what they say, and reflect your understanding of it back to them – in other words, engage in active listening.
2. Find common interests: You don’t have to like everything they do, but bonding over a book or TV show you both like, or cheering on the same sports team, is a great way to build your connection.
3. Flirt with them: It’s a rare person who doesn’t appreciate it when their partner makes their desire for them clear, so if you’re wondering how to tell someone you love them… try a little flirty behavior!
4. Step it up on social media: Don’t go overboard or you’ll risk looking like a stalker, but making it a point to like their photos or leave thoughtful comments on their posts shows them you value their looks and their opinion, too.
5. Pitch in without being asked: Wondering how to tell someone you love them? If they’re struggling with something, jump in to lend a hand or take over so they can take a break – only if that’s something they want, of course.
6. Give them a little something just because: Candy they like, an issue of their favorite comic book, even a link to an article you think they’d find interesting – all these little gifts are just different ways to say ‘I love you’.
7. Pay attention to them: Whether it’s carving out time in your schedule for them, being aware of where they are even when you’re with other people, or noticing the little things, make it a point to show them that they matter to you.
8. Take care of an errand they’ve been putting off: Whether it’s running to the store for that one random ingredient they forgot, scheduling a doctor’s appointment, or getting the oil changed in their car, show your affection by making their life a little easier, just because.
9. Let them pick the movie or TV show: Even if you wouldn’t be caught dead watching a rom-com, or if crime shows put you to sleep, make it a point to indulge them every once in a while – you never know, you might actually end up enjoying yourself.
10. Leave them a cute note somewhere they’ll find it: Okay, yes, technically this is using your words – but we’ll let it slide if you will. Surprise them with a note or a silly joke and watch their day be made.

How to tell someone you love them without saying the words

So, you know how you feel… but you’re not quite ready to say the words yet. That’s okay! Honestly, there’s no real set time for when you should tell a partner you love them – what works best depends on the two of you and your relationship.

You shouldn’t rush something this important – those three little words will be all the more special when you do finally figure out the right time to say them. So, what’s the best way to tell someone you love them without actually saying the words? One option is, of course, to show them how important they are to you – the various love languages can help with that. Of course, if their love language is words of affirmation, you can still show them how you feel without saying anything you might not be ready for. Some ideas for how to tell someone you love them without saying the words:

1. “You bring me so much joy and excitement.”
2. “I love spending time with you.”
3. “I can’t imagine my life without you.”
4. “I value you and our relationship so much.”
5. “I’ll always be here for you.”
6. “I love planning our future together—there’s so much to look forward to.”
7. “You’re the most important person in my life.”
8. “You are my favorite part of every day.”
9. “Being with you feels like home.”
10. “You make every part of my life better.”

How to tell someone you love them over text

Text messages get a bad rap, but honestly? They’re a great option for how to tell someone you love them. For one thing, you can take your time choosing exactly what to say; for another, the distance (physical and otherwise) means your partner has the space to react before they have to respond. Another fun thing about texts? You’re not restricted to just words. You can just as easily declare your love with a GIF or a video. If you just want to stick to texts, however, here are a few suggestions for messages to send when you’re wondering how to tell someone you love them over text:

1. Send them a quote from a book or movie they love – it doesn’t have to be something romantic, it can be anything that reminds you of them.
2. Send them a Dad joke, the more groan-inducing the better; research shows that the couple that laughs together, stays together¹.
3. Take a photo of something you see that reminds you of them, and send it along with a funny caption.
4. Send them something silly like ‘Just to be fair to the rest of my family, I’ve decided to love you only on days that end in Y.’
5. Or lean into the cheese and text ‘Baby, to me you shine brighter than a star – you’re a supernova.’

How to tell someone you love them romantically

While texting has plenty of advantages, there’s nothing quite like telling someone you love them in person. You get the joy of seeing their reaction, the pleasure of their immediate response, and the opportunity to connect on a deeper level than just words. If you haven’t said the words before, take the opportunity to make it special. Sure, you could just blurt them out (and that is wonderful in its own way!) but if you already know what your feelings are, why not put in the effort to make it an occasion? Some ideas for how to tell someone you love them romantically:

Make a special date of it

Saying those special words deserves to be a special occasion. You could take them out to a fancy restaurant or show off your culinary talents with a romantic meal you made yourself. Dress up, splurge a little if you can – this kind of thing only happens once, after all. Then once the time is right, tell your partner the reason you went to so much effort to make the date special.

Write it down

Afraid your nerves will get the better of you in the moment? Take a page – no pun intended – out of our forebears’ books and write that special someone a letter. Go the extra effort – do a rough draft with exactly what you want to say, then copy it out by hand onto quality paper. Worried about your handwriting? Don’t be – so long as it’s legible, what matters are the emotions behind the words on the page.

Make a game of it

Is your partner the kind of person who loves puzzles and escape rooms? This idea for how to tell someone why you love them is perfect. Make, or buy, a puzzle, and have a little note with those three special words in the secret compartment that opens when they solve it. You could even add to the fun by making it a series of smaller puzzles, each with a clue to the big reveal.

Say it with music

It’s never been easier to make a playlist that accurately captures your feelings for that special someone. You could choose just songs from genres they like, or show what a good pair you are by mixing your favorite kinds of music and theirs. You could even go the extra mile and burn the finished playlist onto a CD for a really old-school declaration of your feelings, mixtape style.

Just come out and say the words

Sometimes, no matter how cute or thoughtful your actions are, there’s nothing like actual words to get your point across. It’s okay if you’re uncomfortable – seeing their partners work through their own discomfort to do something for them can be very endearing and gratifying to some people. If you’re really nervous, practice on your own, or to random objects. The bright side? Once you say it that first time? It really does get easier.

Showing you care can make a world of difference

No matter what stage your relationship is in, communication is key. Which is why it’s so important to know how to tell someone you love them, whether it’s with words, actions, or a mix. You might think your partner knows how you feel, but remember – they’re not mind readers! So, making sure they know how you feel about them can help you avoid misunderstandings and miscommunication, and strengthen your relationship. Looking for someone you can say those special words to? That’s where eharmony comes in. Our unique Compatibility Matching System helps you find people who want the same things out of a relationship that you do – so sign up and get started on the path to real love today.